What March Actually Taught Me

_{LET’S GET INTO IT}

This newsletter is a day late and I'm not going to pretend otherwise. I ran the Berlin Half Marathon yesterday, flight home was delayed, and I needed a day to come back to earth before I could write anything worth reading.

March is almost over and I want to be honest about it. Not a highlight reel. Not the version that makes it look like every habit stuck and every intention landed cleanly. The actual version. Because I think the edited version of other people’s months is part of what makes the comparison trap so exhausting, and I’d rather give you something real.

So here it is. What March taught me, for better and worse.

_{THE DEEP DIVE}

The month started with a race in Lisbon and ended with one in Berlin. On paper that sounds like forward momentum. And it is. But the middle was messier than that framing suggests.

Could I blame Mercury in retrograde? Sure. It was, technically, in retrograde for part of March. But honestly that would be too easy and also not entirely accurate.

The messiness wasn't cosmic interference. It was just the season, the themes, and the particular collection of things this month decided to put in front of me all at once. Relationships, business, performance, identity. March had a lot to say and it wasn't always gentle about it.

Here is what I actually learned.

The first thing March taught me is that disappointment and a good result can exist at the same time. I ran a personal best in Lisbon by four minutes. Finished in the top 2.5% of women. And I was still disappointed, because I knew what I’d compromised in the week before the race and I felt every bit of it on that course.

That tension took about two weeks to resolve. What finally shifted wasn’t positive self-talk. It was just being honest about what was in my control versus what I chose to deprioritize, and deciding that the result was information rather than a verdict.

The second thing March taught me is that the comparison trap is sneakier than I give it credit for. I’ve been thinking about it all month, writing about it, and I still caught myself doing it.

Not comparing myself to other people, but to an imagined version of myself who made different choices. Who didn’t have a birthday week. Who showed up to Lisbon perfectly prepared. That version doesn’t exist. But she’s very convincing.

The third thing March taught me is that the routines I thought I’d locked in are more fragile than I assumed. A week of travel and disruption and some of them disappeared without me noticing.

What stayed were the elements of my morning routine with the lowest activation energy. The ones that didn’t require the right environment or the right mood. Morning water before anything else. A walk. Writing one thing down before the day starts. The small stuff held. The elaborate stuff didn’t.

The sixth thing March taught me is that letting someone go in business is one of the hardest things you will do as a business owner, and it never gets easy. When you run a small business you invest in people differently. You get to know them. You root for them.

And when it becomes clear that the working relationship is not working, that the errors are too frequent, that it’s costing you time and resources, that the trust has been broken too many times, you still have to make the tough call. I made it this month. It was the right decision and it was still hard. What I know now that I did not know before: the difficulty of that conversation does not mean you made the wrong choice. Sometimes it just means you cared.

The fifth thing March taught me is that the getting-to-know-someone phase deserves more grace than we give it. There is a version of dating in your where everything feels loaded with pressure before it has had a chance to breathe. What are we, where is this going, what does this mean.

These last couple of months I tried something different. I let something unfold without pressure, without a label, without forcing it into a shape before it was ready. It ended, not because anything went wrong between us, but because life intervened in a way that had nothing to do with me. And instead of spiraling, I found I could accept it for what it was. A good thing that existed for the time it existed. That felt like growth.

The fourth thing March taught me is something I’m still figuring out. I ran Berlin yesterday. Second fastest half marathon of my life. It would have been nice to PB, but honestly? This one felt different. I ran it without pressure, without a time obsession, and with a friend by my side. Sometimes a race doesn't need to be a personal best to be a good one. That is something March taught me too.

That feels like enough to carry into April.

The Bottom Line: March didn’t go exactly to plan. Most months don’t. The question isn’t whether everything landed perfectly. It’s whether you’re paying enough attention to know what to keep, what to drop, and what to try differently next time.

_ICYMI

April is a fresh start and however you move, consistency is easier when you can actually see it. Strava logs every workout, every route, every active minute in one place. Whether you are running, cycling, hiking, or doing your Sunday morning yoga walk around the block, it all counts. The goal-setting and progress tracking features make it genuinely useful for anyone building a new habit in April, not just athletes. Free to get started, and worth the premium for the training analysis tools alone. Get 20% off your premium subscription with code VALERIA.

_{THE REWIND}

Five things worth your attention this week.

🎙️ WORTH LISTENING — What Now? with Trevor Noah: "Emily McDonald: Can You Rewire Your Brain?"

Trevor Noah sits down with neuroscientist and content creator Emily McDonald to explore how our brains shape the way we think, feel, and behave. Directly relevant to everything in this issue — if March left you with patterns you want to change, this one is worth your time. Listen to the episode.

📚 WORTH READING — The Gap and the Gain by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy
The whole book is about measuring yourself against where you started rather than where you planned to be. The most useful mindset read for anyone doing any kind of self-work. Read the book.

🧘‍♀️ WORTH TRYING — Insight Timer — Specifically the "self-compassion" and "letting go of comparison" guided meditations. Free, no subscription required, and genuinely useful when the comparison spiral starts at 11pm. Get Insight Timer.

🎙️ WORTH LISTENING — Huberman Lab: “Unlearn Negative Thoughts and Behavior Patterns” with Dr. Alok Kanojia
A Harvard-trained psychiatrist on how to actually unlearn the thought patterns that aren’t serving you. Relevant to everything in this issue. Released March 2. Listen to the episode.

⌚ RECOVERY TRACKER — WHOOP

A month of data doesn’t lie. If March felt inconsistent, your recovery scores will tell you exactly why. Habit building without recovery data is guesswork. WHOOP showed me exactly which habits were moving the needle on my training and which ones I thought were helping but weren't. Consistent sleep timing, morning protection, post-run recovery, it's all there in the data. If you want to build habits that actually show up in your body, not just your journal, this closes the loop. Get a free WHOOP and one month free when you join with my link.

✍️ WORTH DOING — Before April starts, write down three things.
- One thing that worked in March.
- One thing that didn’t.
- One thing you want to do differently.

Keep it to one page.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

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